Addicted to Chaos

Many people are addicted to chaos as a way of life and think it is normal and okay. For these people there has to be something to get upset about everyday or they will invent or cause something to happen. I believe it stems from childhood and living in an alcoholic home. The tension and arguing between parents is something the child comes to accept as normal and then as an a adult needs to keep the momentum going.

I come from the classic dysfunctional alcoholic home and usually during the week our home was fairly quiet. When the weekend came my parents did a three day binge or at least my father did. Friday night it started with both parents being in a good mood for awhile. Eventually the arguing started and I would go to my room and hide. My report cards as a child always said “Laurie is very excitable”and as an adult I know where it comes from.

I see the chaos in my own children as adults. One child lives a quiet existence and one has a crisis a minute. As a younger adult I thrived on chaos, now I don’t. I prefer peace and quiet but it took years to get here. Getting sober is the tip of the iceberg, there are so many other facets to living life without addiction running the show. People in early recovery think that sobriety will be boring. If you prefer chaos to peace and quiet then yes it might be boring. I can honestly say I am never bored. I like my own company and I avoid chaos whenever it is possible.

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